In the Arena, weapons are always welcome. As the midget prepared himself with a knife, we can presume that the Fantasy Geek will be armed with a rather large sword, and the Sci Fi Geek will wield a lightsaber. Everyone knows that lightsabers can slice through almost anything - including swords - and that the Sci Fi geek will win. May the Force be with him.

Choice: SCI FI GEEK

Episode 1 proved that the spiritual Force we all came to admire was nothing more than an overabundance of T-cells, and that made it weak, vulnerable, and not unlike Delta Burke.

Magick rules forever, so therefore my thesis stands. Magic that a fantasy geek uses defeats technology that a sci-fi geek would use. It's that simple. There's no diffusing this argument. You have just witnessed the most rock solid, concrete proof in the universe.

Plus fantasy geeks are more likely to smell and disarm the senses with body odor and bug spray.

Choice: FANTASY GEEK

Basically, it comes down to the future against the past. Fantasy geeks are limited to weapons including blunt objects and are usually short with hairy feet. The thought process of these creatures is stuck somewhere between the Dark and Middle Ages. And come one, we all know that their, "magic", is just smoke and mirrors manipulating the masses to conform.

Now the Sci Fi-er exists in the non existent and can therefore create any weapon necessary in order to defeat said foe. Imagination, in conjunction with present technology can turn any household item into a death ray.

I also applaud their ability to use words with no meaning.

Choice: SCI FI GEEK

Fantasy geeks would get slaughtered in a showdown with Sci-fi geeks. Fantasy geeks rely too heavily on outdated weaponry and armor to survive battles with imaginary dragons and demons. A fantasy geek running around screaming, "Vikingball! Vikingball!" at the top of his lungs would get completely emasculated, at least the rest of the way, by a sci-fi geek with an actual disintegration ray.

No matter what happens in this contest though, neither group will ever get laid because all of the artist types and jocks will be in the crowd banging the women.

Choice: SCI FI GEEK

Why? The 6th level Necromatic spell "Ungodly Aura", otherwise known as "anti-hygienic nostril eating death cloud".

Sci Fi geeks read all about the future. Futuristic soaps. Futuristic showers. Futuristic deodorants. Everyone on the Enterprise has 37 identical suits according to his/her rank. Hence, they always have clean underwear.

Fantasy geeks on the other hand idolize rangers who do things like spending a 218 day stretch in the "wild", talking to Druids, and communicating with wolf packs in order to find out the location of secret orc hideaways.

The Unbathed, like the Undead, cannot be stopped.

Choice: FANTASY GEEK

While the Sci-fi geeks would be busy pasting on their pointy Vulcan ears, the Fantasy geeks would be casting Mordenkaiden's Maniacal Laughter, a complex conjuration involving hopping on one foot whilst lobbing fruit tarts at the enemy. There's not a person alive that can see that and not fall over, sides splitting with riotous laughter. Coupled with a brutal Sneak Attack talent that can instantly kill a distracted opponent, the Fantasy geek has got it all over the Sci-fi geek. They would then throw a massive party, have too many Dwarven ales and get themselves killed at the nearest Renaissance Fair after mocking Sir Robin of Lancashire's helmet plume.

Choice: FANTASY GEEK

Definitive answers to such questions, like the meaning of life, elude man as a necessary wrinkle of the human condition. To shed light on the matter, we can speculate about the outcome of George Lucas’ chin fat meeting Peter Jackson’s waist fat in the arena. Unsurprisingly, these several tons of fat would only conspire to make the most bloated, poorly edited film of superfluous intent since The Matrix Reloaded.

But the share of the film made by Peter Jackson’s fat would somehow be more profitable, and thus in an oblique sense, Fantasy Geeks prevail.

Choice: FANTASY GEEK