Everyone has to try it sometime -- the ever enticing, yet difficult to pull off, outdoor sex. The perfect scenario is having just enough privacy so that the cops don't throw you in jail for indecent exposure, yet public enough to make it dangerously delectable. For those who haven't figured it out yet, follow these guidelines.

If you're planning on going to the beach to do the deed, keep in mind that although it is a romantic locale, sand in your crack is not a fun feeling. Delicately put, sand sticks to wet surfaces and sand is scratchy. Unless you are planning on defoliating your most intimate of places, scratchy is bad. If you absolutely need to do it on the beach, bring at least two very large blankets and a jacket to put underneath the both of you and stay covered up.

Blankets, blankets, blankets

Weather permitting, outdoor sex is nature at its finest. The smell and sounds of nature all around, copulating outdoors can be a spiritual, and very sensual experience. The key to enjoying this event is absolute comfort. Make sure your partner has everything they need to enjoy the excursion to the woods, the beach, the park. Make sure to bring plenty of blankets, because the last thing you want to feel is a centipede in your anus.

Do It In Water

Specifically, at about shoulder high depth in the water and face-to-face-- about fifty feet or so. At that distance, it's far enough way that people on the beach will assume you and your partner are enjoying some PDA. The coming and going waves will bob you up and down and do some of the work. Of course, condoms will be problematic in that situation, and make sure you're comfortable with the water quality to do it in the first place.

In The Woods

There are many rules to be followed. First of all, you have to find an obscure location. There can't be hordes of people walking around you. This means it usually has to be less than beautiful and a few degrees less than comfortable.

You need to fin a nice patch of grass or dirt, preferably to be covered. You don't want to be jabbing yourself and your partner with sticks and rocks every which way.

A good idea is to stay clothed. This also makes it hot. Have your woman wear a skirt and slide it up and over you while you do the doings. Having her be on top is also helpful--keeps both parties alert, is discreet, and easy to dismount and cover up.

In Suburbia

The fact is the great outdoors likens one to subscribe to the hippie stock. Forests, beaches and cliffs aside, somewhere in between town and country lies the 'burbs. This group has to deal with the lawns and sidewalks of their parents' homes. While walking home drunk and horny with girl A that you left party B with, find a nice sloping grass. Preferably one that slants downward from the street as to avoid any passing lights. Drunkeness will provide comfort if the grass is wet. If not lie back and enjoy the copulation with your head facing up hill for maximum comfort and pleasure. In the world, of parents in your business this skill can very helpful to you getting laid. Or you may have to wait til they go visit Aunt Ethel.

Pull Behind A Grocery Store And Bend Her Over Your Hood

This is good for several reasons. Basically, there is still some risk of getting caught, and quite honestly, that's hot. Secondly, doggy style is great, because it feels good, its animalistic, and you don't really have to look at the woman you are pretending to be in love with. Finally, you are right near your car which means you can scoot her back home quickly and go and pick up your next date.