There's hardly a moment filled with more expectation than your first sexual encounter - it's rife with anxiety, excitement, euphoria, concern, pride… the list goes on and on. There are some basic things that are universal, and some that are a bit less likely to happen, and knowing what's in store for you can really make the whole experience much better.

Your first time. Her first time?

The first thing to know about your first time, is that it's not going to be great - it never is, period. The best thing you can do to improve the experience, is to accept that you're in for something new, not something blissful. Sex is about knowing the other person, knowing what to do, but mostly knowing yourself, and until you've gone through it, you can't know yourself too well. The more sex you have, the better you'll know your own sexual persona, and the better the whole thing will be for you, if you're willing to grow.

"If you love the girl, light up a torch, blaze a trail at her front porch. Kiss her 'till your lips are scorched, till the rain falls down on you."
~Ellis Paul

There was a time when relationship fortune was held in the hands of a folded piece of paper that oscillated within the innocent grasp of a pre-pubescent girl. The origami-inspired "fortune teller" was used to predict just about anything from the number of children we'd have, to the choice between formulating a crush upon Tommy vs. Nathan.

While girls gathered in the bathroom to test out bubble gum pink lipstick and sky blue eye goo, the boys caroused around a game of kickball, their only means of hiding from the enigma that their newly blooming gal pals were becoming.

In a time of candy necklaces and ring pop glitter, pompadour bangs Aqua Net secured, and appendages attired in pink leg warmers (despite the 70-degree temperature), there lived a girl named Sami. In my 12-year-old, pre-pubescent innocence, I chose to hang upside down on a 6-foot-high jungle gym so that I might gain the attention of little Jimmy Brady. So what if the height was great and the fall long and cushioned with bark. At the time, I would have done anything to vie for the attention of the boy who had two dimples the size of craters burned into the core of his apple-blossomed cheeks. In my adolescent fervor, I'd wear his favorite color, succumb to participation in dodge ball, and pretend to understand little league. I was insatiable in the devices I'd undertake in order to woo. Flower-peppered notes strewn with anonymous utterings of my affections were sent through Cindy, who slipped them under the table in a footballesque pass to Peter, who would then, in a scarlet-hued blush, slip them to Apple Blossom Cheeks…er, Jimmy.

If you've read the book or seen the movie "Being There" then you've heard a profound simplicity observed by the story's protagonist about how life works. Being a gardener by trade, he explains that the economy is going to recover, because everything goes in cycles; things may look dismal in the winter years, but soon enough spring turns to summer, and the cotton is once again high.

This is very much true, and you should thank your lucky stars for it, because without lows, there are no highs. This is how the universe flows, and this is often how relationships flow, as well. More to the point, a woman's mercurial nature is what makes it flow, and it's your job to deal with it.

Having trouble making your mark at work? Not having any luck making a good impression on your superiors and co-workers? Tired of seeing hot girls at the workplace with no opportunity to make an introduction? Look no further; worry not; you've got an unlikely second chance to show your suave coming up. Your company's holiday party could socio-politically make you or break you.

Disregard whatever notion you have that going to the office party is for dorks. Don't listen to the ex-frat boys and armchair quarterbacks who have been there for five years and are going nowhere, because missing out on the one mandatory mingling opportunity can be your biggest mistake.

That's right - whatever frumpy, bright-colored lipstick-wearing cat-a-holic who sent out the memo asking for an RSVP "if you can make it" is pulling your chain. If you know what's good for you, and you want to get anywhere with your company, or in life, then you'll make an appearance. Your bosses will be expecting you, if they know who you are, and if they don't, this is the only way to catch their attention and get on their list.

Chivalry, a trait encompassing courteous and dignified behavior, appropriate manners and overall good charm, died recently from what appears to be a complete lack of knowledge over its good value in society. It will be sorely missed, especially by us females who seem to now be faced with an odd lot of men strangely lacking in the way of propriety.

I hate to say it boys, but chivalry, that once great wooing tactic, is dead and gone. Much to our dismay, left in its place is a cloud of confusion leading to such preposterous acts as answering one's cellular telephone while in the midst of a dinner date.

Perhaps the computer age is to be blamed. Has our entire cyber interaction sucked from us the ability to hold our own when faced with a living, breathing creature? What happened to that virtuous little voice in your head that once fed you subtle hints about basic civilities, such as holding the door open for the lady passing through behind you?

Are we just too busy these days to care about wooing; too in a hurry to pay heed to going that extra mile to be dignified? The days of Miss Manners and Emily Post, along with their well-esteemed advice, seems to have passed right over the X and Y generations. Maybe in lieu of their guidance, it's time we drew up at least a few fundamental no-no's to get the chivalrous ball rolling again.